So, imagine my delight when I discovered months and months ago that White Wolf and High Voltage games were planning not one but TWO sequels, one for the PS2 (Hunter: Wayward) and another for XBOX (Hunter: Redeemer). Joy! Delight! Much scouring the web for screenies and plot tidbits! Wallpapers and concept art and sneak previews, oh my!

The big day arrives and I grab my copy of Wayward for the PS2 (it was released before Redeemer). The wife and I grab up our controllers, settle comfortably on the couch (my butt nestled in the comfy leather cushions in a display of hedonistic torpor Smackjer would be envious of, I'm sure), sock in a tidy supply of chips and soda (slaying them bastich zombies is thirsty work there, bub) and boot that sucker up.

Within two levels, I know we're in trouble, and I don't mean from the on-screen enemies.

I have to say that if you played the first XBOX installment (or even the second) that the PS2 version’s gonna be… well… a disappointment. No, cancel that… You're gonna feel like the guy that paid $5 at a kissing booth hoping to suck face with Carmen Electra and instead have to lock lips with that hideous wildebeest in the gold lame’ top from "Shallow Hal". After she just ate a anchovy and onion pizza. And belched in your face.

Don’t get me wrong... Lots of the same elements I came to love are present in Wayward: the leveling up your character; the cool, magic-like Edges that do everything from blast zombies with Holy Fire to healing your party to imbuing your weapon with the flames of your righteous wrath. Even the voice acting sounds like they got the same people- it's fun.

But, they're mired in a sea of crappy, pixilated graphics and jerky gameplay. I know that the PS2 is getting a bit long in the tooth, folks, but this is ridiculous. Sure, the zombies are SUPPOSED to be dumb and slow (the better to grind them to paste with your big, honkin' axe with, my dear), but I was sort of hoping to see more than 4 frames a second as they came at me, you dig?

OK, but at least the levels are interesting, right? The first game had a good mix of creepy indoor and outdoor levels. Graveyards, haunted prisons filled with dead, shambling convicts. Well, I hope you liked them in the first game, because you're going to be seeing them again in Wayward. Like, literally. I really get the impression that somewhere the team was backed into a corner deadline-wise, and went a bit "Copy -> Paste"-happy with the level editor, because I remember many, many of the rooms I was forced to slog through from the first game. This time around, though, it appears as if the graphics guys had to limit their color palette to 56 shades of baby-crap tan and old-scab brown. It’s a murky, dimly-lit mess that serves up a heaping helping of frustration rather than horror.

Couple this with several annoying "Scavenger Hunt" levels where you are forced to run all over the level after eliminating all enemies, checking every last corner and crevice for some dinky object (can you say "Booooooooring"? I thought yew could) and you’ll be frustrated too. Unless the game puts you to sleep first. This thing should come bundled with a 24-pack of Mountain Dew taped to the case.

But, you say, multiplayer is still fun, right? Well, it WOULD be, except the PS2 version is limited to 2-player only (the XBOX version supports 4 players, which is, let me just say it, HELLA fun). The play difficulty swings wildly between "Man, this is suckingly easy" to "Man, this is effing HARD" at the drop of a hat, as enemies spawn off-screen and shoot you from beyond the limits of visibility. In one very frustratingly hard level, you're faced with a horde of lumbering, hard to kill junk-pile monsters with deadly flamethrowers coupled with a boss monster that shoots you, machine-gun-like from off-screen. It wouldn't be so bad if you had more room to run around or even more players to help you kill stuff, but even with 2 we died so many times that we almost stopped playing the game right there. Grrrr...

And WTF is up with the choice of limiting the ammo on your core ranged weapon?? As in the XBOX version, each Hunter comes standard with a ranged weapon (a pistol, shotgun, etc.) and a melee weapon (axe, sword, knives, you get the drift). Additional weapons (bazookas, machine guns and even the ever-popular chain saw) have limited ammo and are usually reserved for boss battles. But, unlike the XBOX version, which gave you unlimited ammo for your core ranged weapon, the PS2 version limits your ammo. Why? It worked just fine having "all the bullets the zombies care to eat" before. Is there some sort of limitation in the PS2 that makes unlimited ammo impossible in Hunter? Maybe it’s the same technical limitation that makes all the level textures look like they're smeared with dookie. The same limit must keep you from being able to configure your controller as well. I mean, come on- not everyone can bend themselves like Chinese contortionists to reach the shoulder button/sticks combos needed to pull off the special moves you had BETTER be mastering, since you no longer have unlimited ammo to fall back on when you get hoardiaked by the jerky, pixilated zombies. Is the ability to program my own button configurations really too much to ask?

Bottom line: do yourself a favor and get a copy of the XBOX version- either of them. Many of the things I loved in the first game are intact in Redeemer (the second installment for the 'Box). Redeemer even has a very enjoyable leveling-up system that rewards you with experience based on how you play- like shooting? Your Ranged skill goes up. Like wading in with your axe and slicing the heads off of the shambling undead (antialiased and gruesomely, beautifully textured on the 'Box, BTW)? Your Melee goes up- it's a great system. But avoid the PS2 version, unless you’re a total die-hard fan. Life’s already full of too many "almost, but not quite" disappointments.

Do you agree or disagree?