Remember Star Wars Rebel Assault? No? Well, Rebel Assault was one of the earlier Star Wars PC games, and it was a rail shooter. A rail shooter is essentially a shooter that takes you on a set path; you're in control of the shooting, but not the movement. Basically it's like you're on rails. Rail shooter...Duh.

Well, this concept was acceptable for it's time, and it wasn't necessarily bad, it just didn't really have anything to keep it going to allow it to cross over to later gaming systems. It's one of those styles of game play that has gracefully faded away, as opposed to puzzle games, where the objective is to match up certain patterns and colors and make things disappear.

Then one day, the word came out that there would be a new Star Wars piloting type game, and there was much glee, for Tie Fighter and X-wing were fun. Many moons did these games get played, and there was much rejoicing. The newest game would be about Rogue Squadron, a squadron of elite pilots that many fans of the expanded Star Wars universe would remember. There's Wedge, and eleven other guys who create a human shield around Wedge.

The game went on to be rather successful, and is currently on the third installment, Rogue Squadron III: Rebel Strike.

God I hate these games.

Alright, so that talk about the rail shooters? That applies to this series as well. Rogue Squadron has essentially been a fancy 3D rail shooter. The enemies always come out of the same spot, they fly around on set patterns, and you basically just hold the blaster button and turn your craft in any direction until you've completed the level. The only aspect that makes this series hard is that there are a gazillion of them and one of you. The rest of your squadron can be seen from time to time, either getting shot, or shooting a single leisurely laser blast. That's not so bad seeing as how your one-board blasters have the greatest cooling system known to man.

However, the developers decided to add something different to the third installment, and that's the ability to run around on foot! Apparently the rules of space craft apply to ground troops as well, as you realize your character has the fastest trigger finger known to man. Basically you see your enemy, and shoot at him a hundred or so times, repeat this for a while, and you pretty much have this game in a nutshell.

What other points are there to cover? The levels are the same ones we've played for years, I don't even have anything original to say about them, as the poor level design has been trashed by countless others. It would be like kicking a kid with cancer while he's down. After getting pushed over in a basketball game, in which he got chosen last. But yeah, we're back at Hoth, just so you could ride around on a TaunTaun, because everyone who's ever watched The Empire Strikes Back immediately thought, "I can't wait until technology allows us to simulate riding on one of those things!"

The music is, of course, the music from the original trilogy, looping over and over for the ENTIRE game. I sometimes wonder how much money Lucas Arts has saved by not having to hire a composer to make new music for their video games. It's not that I hate the Star Wars music, but you can only take it for so long.

My suggestion, dust off your copy of Tie Fighter or X-wing, which still somehow manage to kick ass despite being as old as they are.

If you don’t have these games anymore, then I would suggest cranking up the Star Wars soundtrack in your living room and pretend that your couch is a Star Destroyer, your hands are laser cannons, and make whatever laser sound you want. I prefer 'pitchoo!' myself, give it a try! It'll be about as fun as the latest installment in this crappy series.

Do you agree or disagree?